Tuesday, April 29, 2014

My Marriage Turns 5 This Week!

     I can't believe it will be 5 years on Friday!!!  Remember my last post on marriage? Marriage hasn't been the easiest thing I have ever done but I have found in my life that sometimes it is the hardest things that give the best rewards. So I just wanted to share why I still call myself Mrs. Cook after a half decade of living with a certain Mr. Cook whom I have never stopped loving!
     One of my most favorite things about Mr. Cook is that when he can see that I am stressed, he immediately jumps in and starts helping me, or he puts his own opinions and ideas aside so that I can be happy.  For example, he hates spending money and a few years ago while I was pregnant with Sage, I was looking for a birth class to take that would help me with natural birth.  I found a Lamaze class offered at the hospital and was very distraught to find that the lady talked about epidurals and all the unnatural things Doctor's recommend to do.  After an hour and a half talking about that, she spent only a short 15 minutes talking about breathing through contractions and how they would like us to breath so hard that we  hyper-ventilate instead of push.  That scared me so bad and I just felt like crying.  Weston could see that the class made me unhappy and even though we had already paid for that class, he let me find a different one (which I LOVED by the way) and the class was more expensive.  He never got mad or stressed, he just wanted to make me happy and let me sign up for the other one (not offered by a hospital and this new class actually knew a thing or two about natural birth.)  I will always be thankful that he did that.
    That is just one example of the many times he has put my needs above his usual opinions and I appreciate him so much for that.  Also this is just one small example a midst thousands of reasons why I still call myself Mrs. Cook.  I love you Mr. Cook and I will continue to love you for Eternity (none of that till death do you part stuff, only Eternity for us).  Thank you so much for getting down on one knee on January 22, 2009, while cutely shaking with nervousness, and asking me to marry you, I am so glad I said yes!

    Becky joy

P.S. we are celebrating our Anniversary River Rafting and camping in Moab this weekend!!! So happy to be getting away with him. :)

Monday, April 28, 2014

My very own personal homemade bread baking lesson!

    A couple summers ago I decided to immerse myself into making homemade whole grain bread.  I explored blogs and got to work to only find, loaf after loaf was crumbly and brick like.  I still felt very excited and accomplished making bread (even though it wasn't very great) and I sort of moved on from that chapter and never returned.
     Then a few weeks ago in Relief Society a lady in my ward announced she will be making the bread for sacrament meeting and wanted to know if anyone would like to participate in doing this with her and if they did she would teach them how to make it.  I was excited and jumped at the chance!  I have never actually seen a person in real life make homemade whole wheat bread from scratch and I wanted to learn from someone in person! 
    So this weekend she gave me my very own lesson while we made the bread for the Sacrament:

I already had taken a slice out of the bread before the picture and it was so soft and not crumbly at all!  This morning I also had a couple slices for breakfast and it feels just like store bought bread except yummier!  This was a lot of fun and now all I need to do is practice, practice, practice!

Becky joy

Thursday, April 24, 2014

So fulfilling.

                    Is there anything more beautiful in this world than watching your baby sleep?
Sometimes after I put her to bed I go back in and lay next to her for a moment.  She is my little princess.   I love being her Mother.

Becky joy

Wednesday, April 23, 2014

There is good in the world.

     Can I talk about tender mercies for a moment??  Last night I saw an article that made my heart sad and I actually lost sleep wondering how my children were ever supposed to stay strong in The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter Day Saints when there are so many distractions in this world.
     So then today a friend of mine texted me and asked me when a good time would be to bring me dinner!  How sweet is that?  I really felt like the Lord was watching over me and heard my prayers last night and wanted to let me know that there is good in this world.
     I am not sure of what directions my children will choose for their lives but I need to stop worrying about it and know that what I can do for my children is give them a strong foundation in the gospel of Christ while they are in my care.  Also I can continue the service that was shared with me today for others and bring my children a long.

Thank you Tiffani, we loved it!

   Becky joy

Monday, April 21, 2014

Sage's Easter Dress that I made!

I am a Family Consumer Sciences Education major aka home economics, aka sewing, cooking, human development, and Interior Design.  So I have taken quite a lot of sewing classes and I have to tell you, I couldn't sew a thing on my own in those classes.  For some reason when it came to reading a pattern or understanding the teacher's instructions, I felt like I was in Geometry class again (I did awful in Geometry, hardest math class I ever took).  I just didn't get it and I seriously couldn't sew a pillow case without someone standing right next to me telling me what to do next.  
     Then I had Sage and for the first time in my life, I wanted to sew.  I wanted to make her cute clothes and I found this wonderful thing called pinterest!!  I found tutorials where they show you step by step what to do (I am a very visual learner).  And I taught myself how to sew through blogs.  

Here is my very first project, outside a sewing class, on my own (except I went to a friend to help me with the buttons because it turns out my machine does not do buttons and I will be happy to take donations if anyone would like to help me buy a new machine ;)  

The next year is my favorite so far!  I am so proud of myself of how well the bib turned out and it was my first zipper as well:

I made the first 2 dresses following tutorials from craftinessisnotoptional.com

This year I didn't use a tutorial!  I saw a dress online called the Emmaline Maxi Dress and I made Sage's Easter dress this year inspired after this one.  I would have bought the pattern but it was almost 11 dollars and I didn't want to have to pay that and buy the material so I just tried doing it on my own.  I am so happy how it turned out: 

I am so happy I can sew now and I enjoy doing it very much.  Something that used to be such a puzzle to me is now such a joy and a hobby.  

    Becky joy


     We celebrated Easter this year in Ferron, Utah with my Parents and sisters.  I loved growing up in Ferron, it was so fun, basically as a child we ran around (without shoes on) all over town.  It was a lot of fun!  
     Sage and I actually went on the Tuesday before Easter to celebrate my Mom's birthday with her.  Happy Birthday Mom, you have been such a wonderful Grandmother to Sage!
Also here is a little peek at my baby bump from that day. 

On Wednesday, we went to the Wave pool with my sisters!  It was so fun, I was a little worried about how the waves would be with a little 2 year old but she had a life jacket and I had a toddler size tube and I just held on to the tube the whole time the waves were on and the water never came over her head once.  It was also super cute because every time the buzzer would go off she would get really excited and yell, "the waves are back!"
 On Thursday we went to the Easter Egg Hunt held at the Rodeo Grounds in Ferron.  It was super cute watching Sage find an egg and place it in her basket.  It was kind of crazy when they yelled, "Go!"  Those kids are fast!

On Saturday Weston came to Ferron to join us and we decorated Easter Eggs, I got a tye die and glitter kit and we made some pretty fabulous eggs. While coloring eggs I explained to Sage the symbolism behind Easter eggs and how because the Savior died for us, we can be reborn.  You can read more of my thoughts of the true meaning of Easter from here. #BecauseofHim

     We had a really nice Easter this year!  After Sage went to bed on Saturday night I hid her basket and it when she woke up I helped her look around the house for it.  She was super excited when we found it and that the Easter bunny left her some nice things.  Her basket included: "The Easter Story" (a book I got from Wal-mart that talks about Jesus and the true meaning of Easter), Some fruit snacks, heart shaped bracelets, a coloring book (from my sister Katie), a little soft stuffed bunny, and a chocolate bunny (from my parents), and of course her traditional Easter Dress that I make her every year!  I will show pictures of her dress in another post..

     Becky joy

Sunday, April 13, 2014

The best advice I have received as a Mother

     As I was growing restless getting up with Sage many times in the night and I was feeling tired of rocking her to sleep every night I wondered if I should try the "cry-it-out" method.  Ya know that method of when you let your baby cry him/herself to sleep.
     When I first heard of that option I am not going to lie, I thought it was the rudest thing anyone could ever do to a baby, but as time went on I was beginning to think it wouldn't be so bad.  I was low on sleep, I was growing impatient, and I was desperate.  So I decided to try it.  Now when I say I decided to "try" it, I was going about it all wrong!!!  I have learned that when it comes to something like that, you either do it, or you don't do it.  "Trying it"  is the mean part.
     Let me explain a little better by sharing my experience "trying it".  The first night I decided to "try it", Sage probably cried for 2 or more hours (I am really unsure, I think my brain has blocked that experience out just a little bit) and I felt awful!  I felt like the worst Mother ever.  So the next night I decided to rock her to sleep.  After a few more nights of that and getting up several times in the night, I decided to "try" the crying out method again.  We did that for a couple nights and then I once again felt like a horrible person and decided to rock her to sleep again, ...okay so I hope you get the point.  "Trying it" is mean.  I should have just decided I was going to do it and never rock her to sleep again or I should have just kept rocking her and learned to be patient.
     Well since I was feeling like an awful person making her cry it out, and a tired impatient person rocking her to sleep, I decided to pray about it.  I figured the Lord would let me know which way was best and I of course didn't think he agreed with the cry it out method.  What happened surprised me a lot.  After praying about it the words came to my mind, "it doesn't matter, just choose something and be consistent with it."
    That really amazed me and I realized that was so true!  As a Mother, I just received the best advice I had ever been given.  I needed to not worry what everyone's opinions were or advice of what is wrong or right.  What I ultimately needed to do is decide what was best for Sage and I and be consistent with it.
      Another great thing I learned from that experience is to pattern my parenting after the best parent of all, my Heavenly Father.  He is consistent, He has given me the knowledge between right and wrong, He praises me when I don't feel deserving of praise, He corrects me with love, He holds my hand but does not take my trials from me, He has made me stronger, and I love Him.  I am so grateful that even though I am just one small person in His life, He still takes time to answer my prayers and give me advise.

    Becky joy

Saturday, April 12, 2014

Special Delivery Coming our Way

We are having a baby!  Weston and I found out on January 21st.  I actually decided to run to the store at 11:36pm before it closed and I took the test right before midnight on that night.  And of course after seeing it was positive, I had to get Weston out of bed to tell him!  The second line was really light in color but it was still there!

     As much as I wanted to shout it out to the world (if you can't tell I like to share everything, hehehe) we decided to wait because we experienced a miscarriage in 2012.  I told some friends and family (people who I would be happy to have as support if it ended as a miscarriage again) but decided to wait on the world.    

Here's my baby at 6 and a halfish weeks! We got to see the little heart beating and everything.  I also got to hear the heartbeat again last Wednesday! It was super exciting!
I can't believe how big I am this time!  In the pink shirt I am at 14 weeks with Sage and in the yellow shirt is me at 14 weeks with this baby.  Quite the difference, is this seriously normal like everyone says or am I just packing it on more than I should??

   So this time is a little different than last time (every time I say that everyone says it is going to be a boy but I wouldn't jump on a conclusion too fast). The differences I have noticed (or doing differently I guess) are:
* I am so weepy!  I cry a lot more than I did last time.  I cried the other day when someone moved something out of the way for me so I could get through.  It was oh so kind of him.  I am just such an emotional person!  
* Last time I felt a constant luring nausea follow me throughout the day but I never threw up.  This time I have also never threw up but I have felt like I was going to a few times after eating.  I also haven't had the luring nausea all the time, just sometimes. 
*Last time all I could do was think about how I was pregnant and I talked about it non-stop.  This time I rarely think about it.  Weston is amazed at how little I even mention the subject. 
*I am feeling the baby move inside me already!!! It is such a neat feeling.  
*Also this time I am seeing a Midwife and I am loving her so much more than my past Doctors!  She takes so much time with me and guides me in nutritional directions.  If all goes well I plan to have this baby in the comfort of my home. :)

My due date is sometime in the first week of October and I am a little over 15 weeks a long.  We are so excited!  

    Becky joy

Friday, April 11, 2014

Destroying Debt

     As of February 23, 2013 we have been out of debt!  I recorded this on that day,

 "Weston just told me he paid off my student loans today! We are out of debt!!! I am so thankful I married a frugal guy who is much better with money than me. Also I can't help remembering the night I told him about the debt (after we were engaged) and then the night I told him how much it was (on our honeymoon). I'm glad he still kept me."

     We started out our marriage with student loans and we owed money to Weston's parents for a car.  I remember walking down an aisle in Wal-mart thinking about the amount of money we owed and how it was incurring at least one dollar of interest a day.  I seriously almost had a panic attack right there in Wal-mart as I felt my heart start to race and my vision become blurry.  Somehow during that moment I felt peace suddenly overcome the fear.  I was able to calm down and continue my grocery shopping thinking about other things.
    Debt is not fun, it is very cage-like.  I felt trapped and I never felt like I could buy anything that we didn't need such as new clothes, jewelry, eating out, and any extra expenses because that money needed to go to debt.  It became so freeing to get out of debt!!!  And I never want to return on purpose, except for a mortgage, and even then, I will need to feel very secure in our financial situation before that ever happens.  
     So, how did we get out of debt?  While in debt my husband and I shared a cell phone.  I thought it was pretty funny when I would tell people we shared one and they would ask me, "how do you do that?, how do you survive?, I don't think that's possible for us."   
     The reason why I thought that was so funny is because 5 years earlier everyone shared a phone, it was called a house phone.  And actually it was a lot easier getting a hold of my husband sharing even a cell phone than only having a house phone, because I could text him from my email.  
      Another thing we did was pay cash for everything.  If we didn't have the money, we didn't buy it.  That includes our car, my wedding ring, trips, holidays, etc... In Fact our car was hit and totaled.  I remember we went to look for cars and decided on our '99 Chevy Prism, also known as Vincint, and the car salesman was really surprised when we told him we were buying the car with cash.  Which in turn kind of suprised us because was not very expensive, in fact it was the cheapest car at the lot, and in town. 
     So those things were more just cutting down expenses, but how did we really get out of debt?  Have you ever heard of the book, "The Total Money Makeover" by Dave Ramsey?  Someone introduced that to me after we had been married for a year or so and I checked it out from the library (since I obviously was going to turn to the cheapest route to get my hands on the book) and read it.  It was so good and I told Weston all about it and we started to follow the steps.  We had been trying to save 10% of everything we made to try and get a good savings going for our future.  But Dave Ramsey says, "when you have debt, don't save more than $1000 dollars, instead take all your savings besides $1000 and put it toward your debt, paying off the smallest debts first and then once those are paid off start hitting the larger ones.  He also talks about keeping your expenses down and putting as much money as you can to your debts, so we payed much much more than the minimum required payment.  Then whenever we got extra money, such as taxes back or gift money we put it towards our debt.  It still took a few years but I am so happy we did it!  Because now I feel free!  I feel financially free!! (To get better detail, check out the book from the library, borrow it from someone, or buy it!)
     Since we have been out of debt, we now both have phones!  We are saving money and it actually stays in our savings!  I actually buy things for myself without feeling guilty!  And we are enjoying some nicer things than before, such as family pictures and extra outings.  
     I do have to say we still have our limits because our income is small, but we aren't planning on returning to debt (on purpose)ever again.  And if a financial crisis comes our way and sweeps out our savings, we will sure turn to Dave Ramsey again.  

Love, Becky joy

Sunday, April 6, 2014

General Conference Weekend

     Oh my goodness, I absolutely loved General Conference!!! I enjoyed so many of the talks (if not all) but the one that hit me the hardest was the very last talk given by our dear Prophet Thomas S. Monson.  He not only spoke of God, but helped me feel as though He is very close to me.  That He not only hears my prayers but also can reach forth His hand and hold mine and help me through everything in a very real and physical way.  I loved how the Prophet said, "we face many serious challenges in the world today, but I assure you that Heavenly Father is mindful of us, He will guide and bless us as we put our trust and faith in Him, and will see us through whatever difficulties may come our way.  ..He is indeed our Father and He is personal and real, may we realize how close to us He is willing to come, how far he is willing to go to help us and how much He loves us."
     These words were such a comfort to me and I am so so grateful that we have a living Prophet on the earth today.  I am also thankful to be a part of the Savior's church, The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter Day Saints.  I hope that I can live up to the callings I have been given because of the blessings which I have been given being a part of His church.  I invite you to watch conference by going to lds.org.

     During conference I thought it would be fun for Sage and I to craft while listening.  She loved it and it kept her busy the whole 2 hours of the Saturday morning session.  I think I am going to make this a new tradition because it was so much fun to do this family activity while listening to the Prophet, Apostles, and great leaders in the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter Day Saints (I thought it would be good to include the whole name after Elder Ballard's wonderful talk, p.s. I loved the story about the "follow-up" with his wife.)

I was helping Sage put glitter on the bunny's bow and it made me happy how cute it turned out.

Sage decided Weston needed an apron on while he was cooking so I helped him out getting one on.
Here are our finished products!  A bunny, SPRING, and a little basket with an egg in it.  I really enjoyed crafting this weekend.

During another Session we made orange rolls!  They were super yummy (to make this treat seem not as bad, we started out by eating freshly steamed asparagus).  Thank you six sisters. Sage helped me roll the dough into a string so I could tie it in a knot and then she dipped it in the melted butter.  Another fun activity we enjoyed while listening to conference.  

Love, Becky joy

Thursday, April 3, 2014

Me and my natural self

     From birthing my baby (you can read about here) to washing my face I like to do things a little differently.  I am not really sure why but I have always had this interest and passion for health and once I learn there is a safer/healthier route I usually direct myself that way.
      For example, I remember learning my Aunt gave birth to my cousin at home with out medicine and I remember my eyes getting big as I asked, "why in the world would anyone do that when they can have medication to make the pain numb?"   I mean really?? Why would anyone do that?   Well then as I sat in my human development class when I was 18 my teacher started talking about the risks that come from an epidural and pitocin.  I seriously left that class with a new decision, I was going to have my baby naturally and I did (well as much as I could having my baby in a hospital room, I think they ended up hooking me up to sugar water and some antibiotics since my water broke which I was fine with).
     So anyway, the other day Sage had a little accident while in the bath tub which meant it was time to clean.  Now usually a person might use bleach, Clorox, or some other chemical that is doing who knows what to our home environments and I like to stay away from those products as much as I can.  I will pull out the bleach when mold is involved but other than that I really just try and do things a little more naturally.  
     So here is how I cleaned my bathtub:
First of all I take baking soda and sprinkle it all over the tub.  Another thing I like to do sometimes is mix the baking soda with dish soap and oils to make a paste.  
One of the benefits of cleaning with natural products is that Sage cleans with me and she loves to help! P.S. I just love how her hair curls when it is wet.
Then I sporadically pour a few drops around the tub and floor followed by vinegar.
It's a little hard to tell but when I pour the vinegar it reacts with the baking soda and this is the best time to scrub the floor.
After I am done scrubbing and rinsing it out, I finish off by spraying Hydrogen peroxide on the tub floor and just leave it there until the next shower.

     So that is how I clean my tub,

Love, Becky joy

Birthing my Beautiful Sage

On September 20, 2011 I went into my Doctor's appointment and it was the first time that I was getting checked for dilation and effacement. The Doctor checked and told me that I was farther along than most first time Moms. I was 1.5 centimeters dilated and 70% effaced. I was super excited to hear progress and I called my Mom and Weston's Mom and they both told me that the baby was probably going to come early. I was still trying to get ready for the baby so I felt a little nervous and I am pretty sure I was in the nesting phase from the time Weston and I got into Logan at the end of August all the way until the day she was born. During that next week I felt a few contractions here and there and I was excited that things were moving along (even though it was slowly).
On September 27th I went in and I was 3 centimeters dilated and 80% percent effaced. Usually first time Moms labor pretty much all at once and then after that,their body knows more what is going on and labors over a period of time. Well my body was doing it more slowly like a second time Mom. I just kept jokingly saying, “My body is a natural when it comes to being a Mother.”
The next week on October 4th, I went into the Doctor's office and I hadn't felt any contractions that I had noticed so I was thinking things were going to be the same. The Doctor checked me and I asked, “is it still the same as last week?” He said, “no, actually you are 4.5 centimeters dilated. Lets get you upstairs and deliver you.”
I said, “No! Are you joking?”
He replied, “No, you are most likely in early labor and are going to deliver tonight.”
I then said, “ I would like to do most of my laboring at home.”
He answered, “Well it's your labor, I will most likely see you tonight.”
I left and texted everyone in my family. I was so excited! I then drove to Weston's class and told him. My Mom called and told me that she was coming up.  (And I did not end up going into labor that night).
 On Tuesday October 11, 2011, I had this crazy burst of energy that I hadn't felt for a while. I made 5 dinners and put them in the freezer, I vacuumed out the car, cleaned our apartment, and I walked a mile or more to walk with Weston home from class. I felt really good and I couldn't sleep the next night because of how much energy I had inside of me.
On Wednesday October 12, 2011 I went into my Doctor's appointment. I had been dilating 1.5 centimeters per week for the past few weeks and so I was hoping to be dilated to a 6 or something crazy like that. Right when I got there, the nurse checked my blood pressure like always and it was kind of on the high side which made me disappointed and then the doctor checked me he said that I was still the same as last week: 4.5 centimeters dilated and 80% effaced. Since my due date was in a couple of days, my Doctor talked to me about getting induced and the risk of still births (which really wasn't a high percentage at all) when the baby goes over 41 weeks. I have noticed that Doctor's focus a lot on risks and they use fear against their patients because so many people sew these days and they are just trying to watch their back. In all honesty, I don't blame them. I wish that our society didn't have to create fear for everyone, but it's the way it is. I told my Doctor that I didn't want to be induced and that I was willing to go to 42 weeks.
When I walked out of my little room that the Doctor was seeing me in, the Nurses told me congratulations on the baby being so close to getting here. I was so disappointed from this appointment that I didn't feel excitement at all and I feel bad because it showed. If I could go back, I would cheer with them, but my mind was on everything that had been different than I imagined. When I got home, I opened my laptop and started watching the show “17 kids and counting” on Netflix when all of the sudden I felt a warm gush of water flow out of me. I was afraid my water had just broken and I went into the bathroom and more liquid came out. I checked the color and odor and it was clear and didn't smell like anything (both signs that it was amniotic fluid. Weston was napping in the other room and I went and woke him up and started crying because my water had just broken. I think I said, “my water just broke and now the baby has to come in 24 hours.”
Weston looked at me confused and said, “Isn't that exciting that the baby is going to be here in 24 hours?”
I said, “I'm excited to have the baby here in 24 hours, but I'm sad because my water probably just broke and I'm not in real labor so they are going to want to induce me and then I have a really high chance of having a C-section.”
I had been taking a birthing class from a midwife/ RN that had worked in labor and delivery for 35 years. I decided to call her and she told me that there was a good chance that it was the amniotic sac that had broken, but the first bag of water (that is only about a half of a cup to a cup of water). She told me to watch and if I didn't keep leaking water then I was probably fine. After I got off the phone with her I felt better, but then I started to leak more water and continued to do so. Weston was so good and comforted me. He had class and he stayed home to be with me.
Since my water had actually broken, I tried to put myself into labor. From my class I learned a bunch of different things to do if your water breaks before being in labor to help get your body into real labor without having to use pitosin. I started out by rotating between hot packs (wet rags I threw into the microwave and then placed in a plastic bag) and cold packs (I used frozen steaks). I was able to feel a few contractions from doing that, but nothing regular and constant came. I also made myself some cumin tea (hot water with a bunch of the cumin spice thrown in), and I tried to put pressure on the soft pallet in my mouth. Nothing seemed to work to get me into labor. The last thing on my list (which was actually the first thing she told us to do, but I decided to try all the free methods first) was to take Evening Primrose Oil capsules. I told Weston about them, but I don't think he wanted to get them because everything at the health food store is so expensive. He came up to me after I had been doing all the other things and told me we could get the Evening Primrose Oil capsules (he later told me that he was praying for me and felt good about getting them).
After I took a couple of them, we both lied down for a little nap. I don't think I ever got to a deep sleep, but I am glad that I got a little nap. My Grandma (Dad's Mom) called me while I was napping and she asked me about my labor. I didn't tell her that my water had broken because we decided to wait until the baby was born to tell everyone about me having the baby. I told her my due date was in a couple days and she said a prayer for me over the phone. I felt like I needed that little prayer and I am thankful she called.
We both woke up around 6:30 p.m. And we decided to go on a walk to help once again get into labor. I was starting to get really nervous because I still wasn't in labor. Sometimes I felt a tightening sensation, but that was it. Nothing regular and no pain. Weston could tell I was getting super nervous and he tried distracting me by telling me to look at how beautiful the clouds looked or asking me questions like, “ What color are you going to paint your toe nails?” (I had told him how I wanted to have cute toe nails when I was in labor). I was so nervous that I didn't even want to think about anything like that. We called him Mom who had a Midwife friend to see what she would say. His Mom called her and then called us back. She told us that we needed to get to the hospital since my water was broken just in case the cord came out first which would be very dangerous.
We got to the hospital around 8 pm. I was expecting to get there, have them tell me everything was fine and then get to go home. We got there and the nurse told me that I was dilated to a 5 plus basically a 6 and I don't remember how effaced I was, but I think it was more than I was before. I want to say I was either 90 % effaced or 100% effaced. That was so exciting to hear!! I was glad things were moving along. She also put the monitor on me and it turned out that I was having contractions! Nothing was very regular or super close together and I was ready to go home. I gave her my birth plan and she looked over it.
It included (with my reasoning that wasn't actually on the birth plan itself):
Please do not offer me an epidural or any other medication. (The benefits of having the baby without medication went on and on. Some included: baby is more alert when born, reflexes are better-tests have shown even after 2 years the reflexes still were better on the kids that were born naturally, usually faster labor=less stress on Mom's body and baby, chance of c-section goes down- which is one in 3 now, etc...
I don't want to be induced (No pitocin) (energy spurt isn't there, things aren't soft and ready for labor, baby hasn't released the hormone that lets Mom's body know that he/she is ready to come, high chance of c-section)
I don't want my water broken (too late) or membranes stripped (more pain through labor, there is no real proof that the water being broken speeds up labor, higher chance of infection, higher chance of c-section)
I would like to eat during my labor (more energy, don't want low blood sugar)
I don't want an episiotomy (I don't think anyone does this anymore, but really dumb. Higher chance of tearing to 3rd or even 4th degree tear, long recovery)
I don't want an IV unless there is an emergency or I'm dehydrated ( I want to be mobile and able to move around easily)
I only want to be monitored the first ten minutes of every hour (Once again mobile and I want to be able to walk around)
I want the baby to be handed to me right away and have her apgar test done in my arms (
I would like to spend at least the first 3 hours with my baby without her being taken away from me (The very large amount of endorphins created in your body during labor lasts for about 3 hours and help us fall in love with our baby)
Do not cut her cord until it stops pulsating (I don't want her to be anemic)
No Hepatitus B Shot
Do not give her a binky or a bottle
She right away told me that I was not going to be able to eat anything but ice chips and that I was going to have to have an IV thing (I think they are called heplocks) just in case of an emergency. She also told me that I had to stay at the hospital since my water had broken just in case of an emergency. Then she told me she was going to call my Doctor and discuss my birth plan with him. As she walked out of the room I started crying. I didn't want to stay, I just wanted to go home until my contractions were 2-4 minutes apart. Crying actually made me feel better.
When she came in, she saw that I had been crying and she apologized and I could tell she really felt horrible. She told me the Doctor thought everything on my birth plan was fine, and that I could eat as I pleased! Yay for no ice chips!! He still wanted me to stay and he wanted me to have some antibiotics given to me since my water had broken 8-9 hours earlier to help protect me from getting infections. I agreed and I was hooked up to an IV. First they gave me sugar water and then they gave me the antibiotics. After that they took it off and I was a free woman!
I actually felt really good being in the hospital. I felt calm and relaxed. Weston was so good to me. He went home and got our suitcase and some food. Since we didn't think they were going to make us stay, we left everything home. Once he got back we watched the movie Second Hand Lions with an occasional break here and there so I could walk around. I really loved this time together and all the attention I was getting since Weston left all his homework at home.
After an hour of being there, I was once again put on a monitor and my contractions were now 7 minutes apart and I still didn't feel any pain! I barely even noticed the contractions. I would look at the monitor and it would say I was having a contraction and I would think, “I guess I am!”
My Doctor came into my room around 11 pm and he told me that I probably wasn't in active labor and that it would probably be a good idea to have pitocin, but he would obey my wishes and let me even go past 24 hours without any if that was my wish. I didn't believe him that I wasn't in active labor and I didn't really care anyway. He checked me and told me that I was dilated to a 7! So exciting! Then he told me that he had the next day off so he wouldn't be delivering my baby, once again I didn't care. I really didn't care who delivered my baby, I was willing to catch her myself, it really didn't seem like a big deal to catch the baby.
After he left the nurse came in and said that he told her that I wasn't in active labor and she thought that was ridiculous. I agreed. Things were going really slow, but as long as I was without pain I was fine with a slow labor.
Weston and I continued to walk around, watch the movie, talk, and take some pictures. After a while, I told him that he could rest if he needed and he took me up on it. I asked him, “Isn't it nice that I'm not in pain and you don't have to worry about me?” We were both really happy about the situation so far. While he tried to sleep, I put in another movie, “Ever After”.
The night seemed to go really fast and I didn't sleep at all. I really wasn't tired and plus the nurse came in every half an hour. Before I knew it, the sun was coming up. I was starting to feel my contractions around 7 in the morning, also the same time I got a new nurse. She checked me and I was still dilated to a 7 and my contractions were still 7 minutes apart. I am pretty sure she checked me right before I transitioned to an 8. Weston and I started walking around and I had to pause during each contraction to concentrate on relaxing. They were now definitely closer than 7 minutes.
Once we got back into the room, Weston started to touch me and I think I said, “don't touch me.” I then went to the bed and sat down. My contractions were starting to feel really uncomfortable and they were accompanied with pain. It was getting hard to relax and I could feel myself getting tense every time one of the contractions came. This was making me nervous that things were not going to move along because of me not being able to relax. I could even feel my arm raise because of how tense I was getting.
The nurse came in and I asked her if I could go into the jacuzzi tub and she said that I could, but it needed to cleaned first. She checked me on the monitor and my contractions were now 3 minutes apart. After she walked out, I laid on my left side waiting for the tub to be ready.
The nurse came in a half an hour to an hour later and I asked her if the tub was ready. She told me the cleaning people hadn't come yet. She then told me that I was going to need pitocin since things were moving so slowly and that I hadn't dilated for 8 hours. I told her, “No! I am not having pitocin when my body can barely handle the contractions that I am having as it is” Then she asked me if I wanted Fentanol and I once again sternly said, “NO!” I didn't mean to be mean, it was just hard me for me to be patient and nice when I was starting to feel so uncomfortable. She asked me what was the most important thing to me and what I would be willing to give in to. I told her the most important thing to me was doing what was best for the baby. She looked like she didn't know what to say and she left the room.
Somewhere around this time I was starting to feel my mind go into a different place and it sort of felt like a fire was growing inside my brain. I had read about this happening. This is what our bodies do during labor to help us get through it. Our minds are sent to a dreamy state and endorphins are being produced like crazy as a natural medicine. Everyone was becoming blurry that I saw and I remember my nurse asking me a bunch of questions and I have no idea what she was saying and I kept saying, “I don't know” or my annoying, “No!”. Also time moved so fast. Seven a.m. To the time the baby was born went by really quickly and really only seemed like a few minutes.
After the nurse left talking to me about the pitocin and my high chance of c-section I looked at Weston starting to feel worried that things really weren't moving along and said, “maybe I really should get pitocin and get an epidural so I can relax.” I told him previously not to feel bad for me and he did so great! He looked at me and said, “Get into that tub!” (there was a bathtub in my room). I got into the tub and immediately started to feel the urge to push and I couldn't stop myself from pushing. I yelled, “ I need to push!”
Weston exclaimed back, “Don't push! Breath!”.
We both started breathing really fast but I couldn't stop myself from pushing and I kept pushing. I yelled, “I can't not push! It feels good to push!” (The reason Weston was trying to stop me from pushing is because we were taught to do that in our class, just in case it was the baby putting pressure on my bowel instead of being completely dilated and effaced).
The nurse pulled me out of the tub and I went to the toilet because I felt like I was going to the bathroom. She pulled me off the toilet and brought me to the bed and checked me and she told me that there was no more cervix and that I could push all I wanted! I looked at Weston who had tears going down his face and he looked so happy. I felt so much joy as well. I was now standing on my bed  holding onto the headboard for support  and every time I felt a contraction, I once again felt the strong urge to push. Pushing felt so good, it didn't hurt at all.
Weston kept telling me that I was doing so great and he kept rubbing my back. I loved that and needed that. At one point, I felt tired and asked for some juice and he grabbed my cup and held it for me while I drank. After about 20 to 25 minutes of pushing standing up, I sat down and could see the baby's head coming out. The nurse touched her head and I yelled, “don't push it back in!” I was afraid she was going to push her back in since the on call doctor wasn't there yet. She told me that she wasn't going to and she was just catching the baby. After a few more pushes the baby was placed on my chest (skin to skin) and she was crying. I immediately tried to calm her down. My mother instincts just kicked in I guess. They dried her off and stuck a warm blanket on both of us. The nurse announced that she was born at 9:36 a.m. It was so amazing. I couldn't believe it, I was holding my baby. It was so weird to think that she was inside of me the whole time. She looked different that I thought and I was already starting to fall in love with her. I was also exhausted and everything and everyone in the room was sort of a blur.
I do remember the on call doctor getting in there and she delivered my placenta. I didn't even notice it coming out and I looked at it and said, “Oh good.” I was so relieved that I hadn't felt any pain because I was ready to be done. The doctor announced that I had a first degree tear and she stitched me up. I remember saying, “Owe!” annoyingly. I was just so ready to be done with everything that every little bit of discomfort was super annoying.
Overall I loved my labor experience and I was blessed so much with the knowledge and health that I have. I could not have asked for a better labor. My prayers were answered and I have a beautiful baby girl that I love more than I could ever imagine.

Love, Becky joy